Monday, August 31, 2009

On Being Called A Fossil

I was driving down the road listening to a song the other day. I thought it was a Rolling Stones song, but I wasn't sure of the title, so I glanced down at the radio screen. It said "oldies", and I remember thinking, no, that can't be right. That's not an oldie. It's only a few years old. Now I know the fact that it was a Rolling Stones song should have tipped me off, because anytime your lead singer is their 60's, you know there probably haven't been many recent hits. But it wasn't until I remembered the first time I had heard it that I realized that it was indeed an oldie....



Later that night, The Husband and I were watching the Little league World Series, and he suddenly said "Did you just see Bucky Dent?" I had missed him, because I was half- watching and half -reading. "No, why?" ..."Well, do you remember him? Do you know what he looked like?" ..."Of course. Bucky Dent. The Yankees...nice looking guy, black hair..." The Husband laughed. "Well, not any more. Totally gray. A little paunchy." ..I got on my laptop and did a search...and sure enough, there was Bucky Dent in all of his middle-age glory. The Husband and I just shook our heads. "I think we're getting old", I said.



So when I turned on my computer yesterday morning and saw the little message that The Bother-in-Law had left for me on facebook, I guess I wasn't that surprised. I had used a quote from the old movie Love Story in the previous day's blog title, and he was chastising me, saying that I needed to be quoting more updated movies...that (and I quote) "only old fossils like you and me can quote that old movie".......Ok, in my defense, I was a little girl when that movie came out. I don't think I ever saw the whole movie...although I did play the theme song on the piano in one of my piano recitals...but I always thought the quote was sweet. I've quoted lots of movies in the blog...Forrest Gump...Is that considered an "oldie" now? And what about "You've Got Mail"? Is that an oldie? I don't know...and honestly, a good quote stands the test of time.



A little later, I did my morning yoga routine...a 30 minute show that I do daily. This particular day, the narrator stressed that these were "extremely challenging poses". Well, when I finished, I was feeling pretty darn proud of myself...when suddenly I had a flashback of swimming several miles a day as a 10 year old. Then playing tennis for hours a day as a teenager. In my twenties, I did aerobics, played raquetball, and did Jane Fonda's workout religiously when I was pregnant. Even my thirties were spent running and doing weights...and post pregnancies, I sweated through Cindy Crawford's pregnancy recovery tapes. ...so you see....all of a sudden, finishing my 30 minute yoga didn't seem so amazing. Ok, I reminded myself, I do walk/jog most evenings for a few miles...but even that is more for peace of mind....the word 'fossil' kept running through my mind...



The Boy says to me on occasion, "I just want to freeze you the way you are now." Funny, that's exactly how I feel about him. But it doesn't work that way, does it? Life rolls on...and I suppose the key is to roll with it...Our looks, lives and abilities change, but the meaning doesn't have to, does it? At the end of her life, my mom was in poor physical shape. She was experiencing dementia. She wasn't able to do get around much or remember much. But none of that mattered to me. I would give anything to have her back...just like that...for even an hour. Because it was her spirit and love that counted...not how far she could walk or how many movies she could quote...

So tomorrow, I'll continue to hum Rolling Stones songs, quote old movies, and do my yoga...and enjoy it...knowing that being an "old fossil" is ok...

On Being a Hypocrite...

Over the last few months, I have written extensively in the blog (some would say ad nauseum) about the over-abundance of technology used these days. I criticize the schools for laptops, The Husband for the blackberry, The Boy for wanting a cell phone, Big Sister for facebooking...and on and on. Well, this weekend, I was shoved off my high-horse....Let me explain.

I picked up the kids from school and we headed to our old neighborhood to pick up Little One's old BFF. This little girl was her friend from preschool to, well, whenever we moved here a few years ago. They were very close, but hadn't seen each other in 2 years, mainly due to me being a bad mommy. Little one always asked about her, but the distance (an hour) just always seemed to make any connections impossible. Easy for me to say, since I stay in touch with her mom, who is one of my best friends. We don't see each other as often as I would like, but we....talk on our cell phones during afternoon pick-up time, e-mail...and even facebook. She reads the blog and comments often....so all in all, we are able to keep in touch due to technology, right?
Anyway, it occurred to me on the way to pick her up that maybe after 2 years, things might have changed. Maybe the anticipation had been better than the weekend would be. But happily, after 2 minutes together in the car, I was proved wrong. They discovered within 5 minutes that they both loved Selena Gomez, the colors green and yellow...and they both no longer had bangs!!! Could they be twins?...separated at birth??....No, The Boy patiently replied, they couldn't...different parents...and he looked at me with the knowing "look" that only The Boy can give me....

So we started a lovely weekend. We arrived at Grandma's house, unloaded the dog, unpacked the bags, plugged in the laptop....and what??? No connection?? Ok, well, there had been storms. Maybe it was just off for awhile. We ate dinner, went swimming, played outside...and tried again. Still no connection. I started to get that anxious feeling you get when....well, I don't know. Just that feeling that I wanted to "be on". I had no work to do...no blog to write...no e-mail to respond to.....but look....I Wanted To Get ON!!! I called Big Sister who lives in the same neighborhood and asked if her laptop was down....nope, good to go. SIL even got on the phone (and I should have been ashamed to have him do this, as this is what he does all day at work) and tried to talk me through some strategies to make it work...but to no avail. The Husband had already abandoned us and gone back to work...because he cannot be without his internet access. So there I was on a Friday night, with no access to "surfing". A tragedy. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I remembered complaining about our dependence on this stuff. The word "hypocrite" crept into my mind.... but I pushed that thought away. Thankfully, I had saved the new fall Vogue, all 600 pages. So The Boy settled for the Braves Game, the Little One and BFF watched a Selena Gomez movie, The Husband watched the Little League World Series....and I disappeared into the land of Vogue...

The next morning, The Husband summoned a "techie" to see what was up.....and low and behold...it was bad news. A "fried modem". Now I have no clue as to what this is...but I heard the words "I'll replace it Monday morning"...and my heart sank. Two more days without my "access". The Husband, seeing my face, offered to take me to his office, but I couldn't just abandon the kids....so I gave up. There would be no surfing, no shopping, no e-mailing, no facebooking....I would be forced to live in the real world.

It was actually a wonderful weekend. Little One and BFF played together like they had never been apart, and I found myself promising to set up an e-mail account for Little One when we got home so they could keep in touch...because after all, what is good for the goose is good for the gander...if I could keep up with my friends that way, so could she.

We packed up and headed home on Sunday, and as soon as we got home, I immediately 'booted up"...and nothing. Thankfully, The Husband worked his magic, and I was on!! 51 emails! 7 facebook notifications! 10 shopping alerts! Oh the joy!....But the first thing I did was create a kid's account for Little One, who immediately launched an e-mail to the weekend BFF. And she was immediately met with a sweet response, declaring in big pink letters, that the weekend had been "Great!!". I was so happy for both of them, because now, due to that monster of technology, they will be able to chat in the evening about school and Selena, and even plan another weekend.
Big Sister e-mailed me that she was "cutting the facebook cord". 650 friends had become too many to keep up with...too much drama. She had tried merely deleting some names...but there had been upheaval and more drama. So she got out all together....how long can it last???How will she communicate with her friends during the day? How will she make fun of my blog? How will she joke with The Niece...and the list goes on and on.....I think we will see her back soon....under a new, perhaps "secret" name....

So until tomorrow, when I promise to refrain from technology-bashing for at least a month...but The Boy should take no solace from this...for there will still be no cell phones until there is a name on the honor roll...

Friday, August 28, 2009

If You're A Bird, I'm a Bird" The Notebook

I usually take great care in coming up with the blog title. I've noticed over the months that certain titles seem to draw more readers. I don't always choose based on this fact, but sometimes I do. I love to find a quote that ties in with what I'm writing about. That's what I did on Monday when I wrote about the "tiff". I remembered the quote from Love Story and thought it was the perfect lead-in. That is until yesterday when the Brother-in-Law informed me that the quote was an out-of-date reference. He said he doubted that any of my readers had heard of it, much less seen the movie. Now I agree with him about seeing the movie, but I guess I thought this was one of those iconic quotes that held up over time, kind of like "Play it once, Sam" and "Here's looking at you kid" from Casablanca, or "You had me at hello" from Jerry Maguire. Anyway, I'm making a note to update my references...and so today's blog title has nothing to do with the blog. It was suggested that I need to be quoting movies like The Notebook, so even though I'm not sure this quote will stand the test of time, I gave it a shot. The rest of the blog will have to be quick, because normally I would only spend 2 out of 23 minutes on the title...

I'm glad we are at the end of the week. The Boy is off to a great start at school. Being in 7th grade, he received a laptop this week. As you can probably guess, I have mixed feelings on this. In some ways, it is an unbelievable educational tool...in other ways, it just perpetuates the technology crutch that all of us are falling prey to. Will kids ever be asked to actually write a story or paper again? Isn't it kind of sad that they will never know the frustration of having to start over on a page because they messed up...and don't have a backspace or delete button to correct it? Can you imagine that he will actually be doing art projects on the laptop? When I think of art class, I think of pencil sketches and oil paints....not cropping pictures on the laptop. Oh well, I guess I just need to "roll with the times" as The Boy would say....

His computer is equipped with a webcam, which allows him to "video-chat" with friends. He is enjoying this little extra...for reasons that I will not divulge in order to preserve his privacy. I actually like this too...because it encourages TALKING instead of typing...a healthier way, I think, to conduct any relationship. I always have this premonition of our children texting with their spouses and children instead of talking in the future. Every day when I pick up The Boy, I am amazed at the number of kids who are standing around together texting on their phones instead of talking to each other! Of course, The Boy has still not entered the world of cell phones yet, much to his dismay. He came home the other day insisting that he was one of only 4 people in his grade who doesn't have a phone....and his description of the other 3 kids was so funny that I had to excuse myself and go to another room to laugh. (It wasn't mean-spirited...just funny). I'm hoping that the laptop will help to allay some of his phone obsession..we'll see.

So until next week, as I pack to head to grandma's house for the weekend....Little One is having an old friend over, and she is so excited that it has us all in a good mood...remembering that the anticipation is half the fun....

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Reader Response and Testosterone Poisoning

I started this blog back in February. At the end of the month, I had 700 visitors. This didn't include the people on auto-send, who have it sent to their e-mail each morning...or the people (about 20) that read it on my facebook page. The next month, the total went to 1500. I felt pretty good about that, like it was a pretty good following. However the next month, the number stayed the same...1500...and the next month. I felt a little deflated, like I had peaked too quickly. So I e-mailed the site and found out that the counter was broken. Feeling secretly relieved, I decided to install this little thing called Sitemeter. This allows me to not only see how many people visit each day.but how long they read and where they live. Now don't panic...I don't see any names, and most of the time, no companies...all though I do recognize some friends by the city or country. The most interesting information I can gather from this is which days and subjects are the most popular. (I'm taking a long and rather ego-stroking path to my subject today.) Up until now, by far the most popular subject was Flirty Mango. The day I recommended this product, the number of readers doubled and reader response was huge. (I find it interesting that people e-mail me rather than leave a public comment on the blog,a story for another time)...but that has all changed....


After Tuesday's blog, when I discussed the "tiff' with The Husband...I had the most responses I had ever had. For the next 24 hours, I was inundated with e-mails from both men and women either sharing their own stories of marital discord...or empathizing with mine. The icing on the cake was the short but sweet comment that came from a reader this morning...I won't reveal his identity, but I will say that he was from another country. He said "I only want to know if you had any trash bags...you never divulged this information." This made my day, and it was only 6:30 am.


So today, I am going to share my favorite responses with you, because who knew so many people are also baffled by the age-old question of why a man can't devote 30 seconds to a conversation...



1) The first response came from one of my best friends, who I think had replied before I finished writing...she allowed that not only did her husband do the same thing to her...but so did her kids...she added that she was glad The Husband had "seen the error of his ways"....Now wait...I never said that...I just said he apologized...In our family, that is a whole different thing.



2)Another friend mused about how she felt like most of my readers missed out because they don't actually know The Husband. She said she thinks that people think I am kidding, or taking some sort of "poetic license"...and little do they know that he does actually do things like move the creek...(and yes, we were visited by the EPA)



3) Brother-in-Law only wanted to know more about the creek...where did it finally end up?, what happened to the bobcat?, etc.....typical man, he missed the whole point...



4) Sister-in-Law's comment quickly followed.."I Feel Your Pain...His Brother Does the Same Thing to Me"........I suddenly had a visual in my mind of the brother-in-law nodding his head while glancing over sister-in-law's shoulder to watch the Mets game or a horse race....



5) A male friend attributed The Husband's behavior to "testosterone poisoning". Having never heard of this, I looked it up on line and found an actual definition on a site called Urban Dictionary. The first definition was "When a man dies as a result of doing something stupid, or "stupid guy activity". The second definition cannot be repeated here because this is a family blog.



6) The above friend's wife allowed that he had a tendency to turn on loud appliances in the middle of a conversation...isn't it interesting how men generally ignore messes until they are in the middle of a conversation with their wife, and then they are suddenly in a rush to vacuum or find a trash bag??



7) Son-in-Law was also more interested in the whole creek-moving incident, as he was not in the family yet when that occurred...but he said that Big Sister is just as guilty in this area, often-times interrupting one of his 'rants' (his word, not mine) to ask where the computer-charger might be. This just proves that the younger generation of women have it figured out. They don't spend anytime worrying about interruptions because they are busy doing the same thing...



8) The Senior does not read the blog, but if she did, she would say "Mom, why didn't you just tell him what he could do with those trash bags?"....



And finally,The Husband responded by saying..."I don't remember apologizing"...which started the tiff back up again...



So until tomorrow, when we will continue to discuss the dynamics between men and women...but first I have to take a load of stuff downstairs from my dining room table....

"I've learned the good-byes will always hurt, pictures will never replace having been there,memories good and bad will bring tears..."

I was sitting around missing my mom this morning when I heard the news that Ted Kennedy died of brain cancer. Though I was never a supporter or admirer of Kennedy, my heart went out to his family because brain cancer is devastating. My mom's cancer moved to her brain at one point during the last year of her life, and it was a difficult road.

It got me thinking about the moments in your life that you can remember clearly, even as the years go by. My first vivid memory is of the day JFK died. I was only a toddler, but I can picture the scene in my mind. When I first told my mom that I remembered that morning, she assured me that I couldn't have...until I described to her exactly what she was doing...and she agreed that it was indeed correct. I remember sitting in our den, "helping" her mop the floor. The TV was on..black and white....and mom was crying. I think this is one reason that it stuck out in mind. Mom was never a crier. In fact, this is the only time I can ever remember seeing her cry until my dad died.

The next clear memory I have is practicing for swim team. Every summer morning of my young life was spent at the pool from 7 to 10. I remember cold water, coaches shouting instructions...and lying on the warm pavement during breaks to get warm. I also remember hitting the snack bar with my friends after practice...starving after 3 hours of "torture".

One of my happiest memories is of times spent at my grandmother's house. In our southern family, she was called "Mammaw". I wasn't especially close to Mammaw...she had 8 children and loads of grandchildren, so there wasn't really time for a lot of one-on-one bonding, but we enjoyed a simpatico relationship. She was quiet and hard-working. She married as a teenager, had several children, and then lost her first husband. I don't remember exactly what her jobs were, but I know she worked for the government, ran a shop...and mothered 8 kids. She was also a fantastic cook...not in the "I watch Food Network and try those recipes from time to time" way....but in a "I cook 3 meals a day for 11 people" sort of way. I can still taste her 7 layer cake, her coconut pie, her marinated carrots, and her fried chicken and biscuits. I loved to help her in the kitchen...we didn't talk...I just watched her and did what she asked. My grandfather (Pappaw) was a bee-keeper, so we always had fresh honey to go with everything. (That is another vivid memory...watching Pappaw dress up like a space man and go out to "tend the bees.)
After "supper" at Mammaw's, my brothers and cousins and I would head outside to catch fireflies in jars. Her house was at the base of the Smoky Mountains...and a little river ran behind it. Even at a young age, the beauty of this area was not lost on me. I can remember staring at the mountains and thinking how pretty they were. My older brother would take a canoe across the river to the "caves" and explore. I was never allowed to do this, but I didn't want to, as I had heard stories of bats in the caves (probably made up by my brother). My little brother and I were allowed to walk into town with 50 cents and buy an ice cream at the Tasty Freeze. This was a nightly routine...usually after several hours of night-tag or whiffle ball.

Those were very innocent days. It was truly another time. No computers, internet or facebook. When you finished eating, you headed outside to play. The games weren't bought...just made-up. I hate to be one of those people who say "good old days", but they truly were good days...and I guess they were old days.

With my mom and dad gone now, I am sadly reminded on many occasions that it is up to me to provide my kids with "memories"....and I don't mean posed memories...but genuine memories where you look back and smile...and actually feel, smell, touch and taste the past. I hope that I am able to give them a bit of that...because on days like today, when you are missing your mom....memories are really important...

So until tomorrow, when I will remember the "good old days", but also try and remember that these will be the "good old days" to my kids...

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Out of Order

Since today's blog is an edited version of a pre-written blog from the weekend, please scroll down to Saturday, August 22 to read!

Monday, August 24, 2009

Weekend Update

It was a long weekend, but that's a good thing, right? The Boy had a big "spend the night" to go to Friday night, so Little One and I dropped him off that afternoon. I strongly suggested that he be sure and get some sleep, because he had 2 baseball games to play Saturday evening. He left me with a hug and kiss and a mild assurance that he would do it. As he ran into the house greeting his friends, I had my doubts, but I crossed my fingers.

Little One was disappointed because the BFF had prior commitments...as did the 2 other friends she invited to spend the night. She was stuck with mom and dad for the night. So the three of us headed to one of our favorite little dinner places and had a nice meal...granted it was quiet meal, because The Boy is usually the talkative one at our table, but it was nice. And when we got home, I reminded Little One that she could play Webkinz on the computer to her little heart's content because The Boy wasn't here to fight her for the computer. So after hours of Disney Channel and Webkinz, she went to bed happy, even commenting on how it had been a 'cozy' evening.

I headed over to pick The Boy up the next morning, and one glance was worth a thousand words...he had had a "TERRIFIC" time, but had only gotten about 4 hours of sleep. The whole way home, he regaled me with stories from the previous night. Sleep had been impossible due to many reasons...but he assured me he wasn't tired. However, after a second breakfast at home, he headed upstairs, turned on his fan, and slept for 3 hours. I do believe this was the first time since he was 2 years old that he actually "took a nap".

That afternoon we headed to yet another baseball game. The Boy was a bit lethargic, but managed to play pretty well, even getting one of the game winning hits. As we drove home near midnight, his emotional comments gave him away, because at some point, lack of sleep catches up with all of us...even a 12 year old boy.

The next morning I headed to church by myself. I rarely do this, but do you ever have those mornings when you just don't feel like urging everyone else along? The Boy was attending the Braves game...a previous commitment that he was looking forward to...and he was being picked up before church was over. Little One was suspiciously not up yet, which means she was laying in bed hoping I would decide to stay home. The Husband was awake, but pretending not to be, and when I offered to go alone, he quickly agreed and turned back over to sleep. So I went alone and enjoyed the peace of listening to the sermon without having to constantly quiet the kids, keep showing them my watch...and tell The Husband to put the blackberry away...

The afternoon started out well. The Boy was at the game, The Husband had headed to another game, and Little One was out playing with BFF in the neighborhood. I was left on my own to switch back and forth between the Braves game and Food Network, where I learned how to cook Chicken a L'Orange for under $10. Unfortunately, halfway through the show, I got the dreaded call...This call is entitled: The Sisters Are Having A Fight and Mom is About To Be Put in the Middle". The jist of this fight is that Big Sister had lent (lent is a very loose term here) the Hannah Montanna movie that she had rented from Blockbuster to The Senior. The Senior had sworn on her life that she would return it in time...and big surprise...she had not done it. Now, the problem here was that Big Sis and SIL could not rent a movie until that one was returned. This had lead to the Big Sis calling and texting The Senior 543,000 times...and the Senior had done what she normally does under these circumstances...turned off her phone...SO, Mom was forced to intervene....calming down the Big Sis....lecturing The Senior on responsibility(who always responds to this by saying "I make straight A's and raise a child for Heaven's sake")...and I remind them both that I wish I had a sister to argue with...The funniest part of this is when The Little One asks me when I hang up "Ok, so whose fault is it REALLY?"...The Little One is all about the blame game...

So that's about it...all in all a good weekend. I had actually pre-written this morning's blog after a small tiff with The Husband Saturday morning. But you know, it was the kind of thing that seemed funny and appropriate at the time, but kind of petty this morning...

So until tomorrow, when the week begins on a busy, but optimistic note....

Saturday, August 22, 2009

"Love Means Never Having To Say Your Sorry"...Love Story...I mean, The Husband

In yesterday's blog, I alluded to the fact that The Husband and I had a slight "disagreement" over the weekend. I had written about it (pre-blogged) in the "heat of the moment" as it were, and then decided that I shouldn't use it. Several of you sent me comments minutes after you read the blog yesterday morning, complaining that I shouldn't have brought it up if I wasn't going to share it. Others of you just wanted to know what the "tiff" was about. I was going to stand strong and not use it, but then I received a message from The Husband, asking to read the afore-mentioned blog. So I sent it to him and explained that I was not using it. He responded by saying that though it was "grossly inaccurate", it was still "cute", and I was welcome to go ahead and use it.

So today, since The Husband never uses the word "cute"...I decided to go ahead and use it. I will preface it by saying that 1) It is in no way inaccurate. 2) He has since apologized. 3) I still have a load of stuff on my dining room table (to be explained)...

Yesterday's Blog

You will probably notice this week that until further notice, The Husband will not be mentioned in the blog. We had a slight tiff Saturday morning, and I have not yet recovered. In fact, I won't recover until he apologizes...or at least pretends to apologize ("I'm sorry you are upset" does not count). Remember that famous line from the movie Love Story, "Love means never having to say you're sorry"...uh, no.Let me explain...


In the midst of what I thought was a very important conversation...which means I am mid-sentence explaining why he is once again wrong on something...he interrupts me and asks "Do we have any trash bags?" Now let me assure you that there were no trash bag emergencies.....no spills that needed cleaning...no bodies that needed burying...NO...for the 9,543 weekend in a row, he was down in the basement "organizing". Organizing is code word for "avoiding anything of importance that needs to be done in the house, especially if The Wife is not happy with me." For most of our married life, he has found highly interesting things to do for 3 hours on Saturday morning. Nobody is allowed to interrupt, as he makes several trips upstairs with a distressed look on his face. And here is the deal....during the week, he takes loads of stuff down there (oh wait..no he doesn't...he leaves it at the basement door so I will do it). Then on Saturday, he brings the stuff back upstairs and plops it on the dining room table. I've never understood this exercise...kind of like digging a whole and then filling it up. But I just smile and nod and support. Even at our old house, on the day I came home from the hospital with Little one (after having been there a week because I almost died...the story for another blog)....he decided that he needed to "move the creek back a little further"....No, don't go back and re-read that line....you understood...he headed outside to "move the creek." And over the next 5 years, he proceeded to work on "moving the creek" every Saturday morning. (Thankfully, we have no creeks here in our back yard). So back to the story....


It's not that I think I am the most interesting person in the world. I'm not. And it's not that I ask for a lot of conversation from The Husband. I don't. A fact that he will back up because he says it is one of the reasons he married me. But look, DON"T INTERRUPT ME AND ASK ABOUT TRASH BAGS! That's all...you know, because I like to think that just maybe, I have something important to say....and I always listen (even while inwardly rolling my eyes ) to all of The Husband's critiques...


So anyway, The Husband will get a reprieve this week from being mentioned...unless of course he decides to make time stop in the universe and respond to this blog by sending me a tiny apology...


So until tomorrow, when chances are, you will be hearing a lot about the kids....

Friday, August 21, 2009

Thank Goodness it's Friday

Ah, it's Friday. We made it...and it was a good week. I have to say my little prayers of thanks. The first week of school is always stressful, but this year, everything went very smoothly. I'll have to admit that it had more to do with my attitude than anything else. When I am able to keep a positive attitude, it seems to trickle down through the family. Even The Boy, who was depressed that he has to bring packed lunch this year (his school lunches were topping out at about $8.00 a day last year) came around. Instead of complaining, he gave suggestions for the lunch box. Breakfasts were calm and easy. We all sat down, we all ate the same thing...and then The Boy made his mad dash for ESPN and Little One ran for the hair-straightener.

The Boy is playing for 2 different baseball teams this fall, so 2 nights a week he is getting home very late. This would normally cause a lot of turmoil (for me). But instead of approaching it like a bad thing, I decided to go with the flow...and to my great surprise, all is fine. He easily finished his homework before practice...and I think he even ended up asleep earlier than usual because he was exhausted.

On another note, The Husband sent me a note yesterday asking me to highlight anything in my blog that had to do with him, or might interest him...this was so he could avoid having to "plow through the whole thing"....Ok...I'll jump right on that. I told him that he better be careful or when they turn this blog into a book and then a movie...he might not like who I cast in his part. (To which he responded that he would like to be Danny DeVito...The Husband is always a smart alec) Speaking of casting parts...I would like to be Michelle Pfieffer or Sandra Bullock (I figure I get control over this, right?) Big Sister will want to be played by Miley Cyrus...but that won't work for many reasons. The Senior will choose someone who I have never heard of....The Boy can be the brother on Hannah Montanna.....and that leaves Little One, who will beg for Selena Gomez, but the ages just do not match up......All of this dangerously illustrates my rich fantasy life...

On to a more REAL subject....Project Runway was back last night. I absolutely love this show. I just admire the skills of these people. I made a C+ in Home Economics (back in the day when that was a subject) when we did sewing. I attempted an A-line skirt in the ugliest color of green you have ever seen...and needless to say, it was hideous. I did wear it one day, but oh my goodness...Anyway, this group of 16 people were really talented. They created beautiful evening gowns in 2 days...and most of them were lovely. The girl that went home was a little too "out there."..not only was her "creation" silly, but she was the only designer who did not know how to sketch. I know sketching is not a must for creating clothes, but on this show, it is almost necessary. The one low point for me last night was guest judge Lindsay Lohan. Not to be judgemental or anything, but after all of her tabloid antics over the last few years, I have a hard time listening seriously to her take on anything. I much prefer when they have Diane Von Furstenburg or someone of that level of expertise. And I just love Michael Kors and Nina Garcia...the look on their faces when something less than perfect comes down the runway is priceless...

So that is it for the week...with gratitude that all is well, and the hope that next week will be the same...

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Glenda's Top 10 Picks for Fall (along with my opinions)

I picked up the new issue of Elle magazine the other day. I don't buy Elle very often anymore. Ever since Nina Garcia, the Doyenne of the Project Runway judges panel left as editor-in-chief, the magazine has floundered in my eyes, a mess of advertising pages and no direction. But I was swayed by the lovely picture of Jennifer Anniston on the cover, and the tease that I would learn "Who her real friends are". Why I am secretly fascinated by this information is a whole different issue, but I also realized that there was a "must-haves for fall" section in there too. Since I knew I was going to write about Glenda Bailey's Top Fall Picks today (editor of Bazaar), I decided I would peruse the Elle list and compare.

First of all, the Elle list has 25 items. This is a turn-off for me immediately, because who on earth is going to buy 25 "must haves" for fall...especially right now? So right away, I'm skeptical. The first few picks are fairly benign...camel coat, robe-tie coat, toggle-coat (come on, how many coats are "musts"?). Next I start to lose interest because they are suggesting capes and mini-dresses...with a grecian look thrown in...oh, and not to mention a one-shoulder look. But the final clencher is #15...leather shorts. Now here's the thing...if I can't imagine anyone I know wearing an item...I have to believe that it is a no-no. Even my most fashionable friends are not going to be sporting leather shorts this fall....needless to say, I gave up on the list and went on to read about who Jen's friends were...

On to Glenda's Top 10 Picks.....

1) Pop of Color.......This one is easy. She showed a Marc Jacobs purse in bright aqua as an example, but I have a great magenta clutch that I bought on sale from J Crew last year that works...and I did see some cute lavender patent clutches on the 75% clearance aisle at Target...

2) Plush Texture...she shows a velvet dress as an example...again, I am good to go since I bought an olive velvet jacket (on the sale table) from the J Crew outlet on vacation in Connecticut last year...but again, a velvet scarf or clutch would accomplish this one.

3) Simple Geometry..she shows a very architecturally-cut dress for this one. I love these kinds of things. One of my all-time favorite dresses that I ever owned was a Norma Kamali column dress with shoulder pads...it was cut very close to the body and structurally beautiful. It was in a very bright floral pattern, which wasn't my favorite..but I bought it for $60 in my 20's (which was a steal at the time) and I wore it for 15 years.

4)Flat Boots. These are a staple for me. I live in boots in the winter...heels and flats. My favorites are a pair of flat brown leather ones from...where else? J Crew...but I also have a pair of 10 year old Armani's in lavender suede..they are lovely...I found them on the clearance table at TJ Maxx...the color and fragile suede keep me from wearing them a lot, but they are pretty.

5) Over-the-Knee boots. Ok..I have always wanted a pair of these. I find them fascinating...and she showed some Laboutins that absolutely made me drool. But I think I have missed the boat on those age-wise. And I just cannot picture a place that I would wear them. Church? NO. PTA? No. Dinner at Applebees? No....Ballgame? No......Ok, that answers it for me...but I am urging all of my young fashionistas to bite the bullet and go for it....I can definitely picture the Niece in them....

6) Classic white blouse. I collect these. She showed an Yves Saint Laurent that cost over a $1000...which is RIDICULOUS...however, it was just lovely, and I will look for a knock-off...

7)Dazzle Jewelry. She showed Vera Wang crystal earrings. This is an easy fix...you could find costume jewelry for $10 (www.thelittlejewelrybox.blogspot.com)

8)Military Jacket. I love these too. I remember one year I bought a black one with big gold buttons and my brothers called me Michael Jackson. But seriously, they are classic and you can wear them with anything if you don't go too crazy with the buttons.

9) Pencil skirt w/high slit......Ok, I own more pencil skirts than anything else in my wardrobe...but the high slit never worked for me. I am just too self-conscious. I remember once when I was working I had on a black pencil with a fairly high slit and I couldn't move comfortably or for that matter, move at all....I just think these are silly because you spend all of your time trying not to let anything inappropriate show...

10) Animal Print Scarf. ...I actually think this is a great piece to have. A friend of mine brought me one back from New York a couple of years ago (The back-story is that she was in a boutique and saw Sarah Jessica Parker buy the same scarf...so she got one for me!) and I have worn it to death. I wear a lot of black, brown and beige...and the animal print can sometimes liven it up a bit. I also think that animal print shoes (I bought the patent from J Crew) can also be really cute...you just cannot over do it.

So that's it for the list. A lot of these items can already be found in your closet...so this is the kind of list I like, because many of us will be shopping in our closet this year. But if you do want to buy one, I would say that all of them except for the over-the-heel boots can be picked up for very little money.

As a side-note from yesterday's blog...the Brother-in-Law, who is already very cool in my eyes, commented that LVMH, the fashion group I raved about yesterday, is one of his biggest clients...how cool is that? Of course, for 5 minutes I was picturing myself living in Paris and working at Hermes....and then the Little One yelled for me to read to her, The Boy said he needed homework help, and The Husband said the sock drawer was low...so I was brought back to my reality...

So until tomorrow, when I will go shopping in my closet and be happy that many fall 's Top 10 picks can already be found in there...

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

"I like fashion to go down to the street, but I can't accept that it should originate there." Coco Chanel

In the movie "The Devil Wears Prada", Meryl Streep plays a part which was known to be based on Anna Wintour, editor-in-chief of Vogue magazine. Near the end of the movie, she makes a declaration to her assistant that "They all want to be us". Though probably a realistic statement at the time the movie was made, I'd go out on a limb and say that these days, not everyone wants to be "them", "them" being the leaders of the fashion industry. An article in Monday's Wall Street Journal detailed the decline in sales for major fashion magazines like Vogue, whose advertising pages are down by 20-30%. I noticed that the June issues of both Vogue and Bazaar topped out at around 150 to 170 pages, especially noticeable in Bazaar because it was supposedly the "Fall Preview" which is usually several hundred pages.



Just a few weeks ago, french haute-couture designer Christian Lacroix was said to be shutting down...or at least changing hands due to lack of business. For years, Lacroix had shuttled through CEO's, decrying the fact that nobody understood artistry, and not allowing anyone to reign in his designs. Even LVMH, under the brilliant leadership of Bernard Arnault was unable to keep him in check. Unlike designers like Vera Wang and Marc Jacobs, who were willing to create "lesser" lines, i.e. less expensive lines for the consumer, Lacroix refused to focus on profitability. In better times, he was able to wade through, but in current times, when consumers are being cautious about purchases, he was unable to make it.



LVMH, the group which oversees Louis Vuitton, Hermes, Fendi, etc...not to mention other luxury goods, is one of the few groups that have remained profitable during this period. They have been able to sustain some growth by convincing the consumer that some items are so classic and of such quality that investing in them even during these times is somehow smart.



Fashion magazines have been exploring online options, something that they had pretty much avoided over the last few years. Fashionistas love their magazines, but in the past year, fewer people were willing to pay the $6-$10 for their fashion fix. Bazaar, under the wise guidance of Glenda Bailey, seems to have faired better than most. I noticed that the September issue once again tops out at about 500 pages, a suggestion that advertisers are coming back a bit. It has been Bailey's ability to branch out and reach out that has benefited her magazine. Just this week, Saks.com sent out a blast-email to customers touting "Glenda Bailey's Top Picks for Fall". Brilliant marketing strategy when you consider that the Saks customer is also the Bazaar reader. What better than to peruse Glenda's "picks" online, and then go buy the magazine and see if you can find some of them? Saks is wisely banking on the fact that customers will read her top picks and then shop immediately for them online. A win-win for both.



Ms. Wintour, Vogue editor, seems to have been less willing or able to make the transition. For so long, Vogue has been the mother of all fashion magazines, not needing or wanting to "reach down" to the average consumer who may or may not be able to afford anything in the magazine...but still enjoys looking. Though still able to attract readers by the aesthetically beautiful covers ( summer covers of Cameron Diaz and Christy Turington were stunning), it seems that Vogue has been less able than say Bazaar or Elle, to reach out to the average consumer. Pages and pages of clothes that rarely cost under $1,000 may be fun to fantasize about, but in these times, the wiser magazines are learning that if you at least tip your head to the reader...in other words, give them a range of pricing so they feel included...your readership goes up. Bazaar's highly successful sections called "Fashion at any Age" reach out to readers from 20 to 70, and this has not gone un-noticed by readers. An effort to show some "lower end" lines has also given Bazaar and Elle an advantage...not that they are touting Target or WalMart...but they have been more willing to throw in the occasional item from Old Navy, Gap or J Crew.

The idea of having to go online to look at my Vogue or Bazaar is really depressing to me. I love my magazines...I save them for years and flip through them over and over again. When I see them in my mailbox, I get excited...yet I sometimes hold on to them for days before I open them, enjoying the cover and the anticipation. I think this is something like say, sports or music...a love that you are born with. It is a kind of code language that you develop..(Did you see the boots on page 53?)....

So until tomorrow, when we will review Glenda's "picks" for fall, and discuss the fact that even though the least expensive item is over $300 and the economy is still in the tank...a girl can dream...

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

"Rivers Know This; There is No Hurry. We Shall Get There Some Day" Winnie the Pooh

Today it's a mini-blog. I'm busy researching an article on fashion which I will blog on tomorrow. (A fore-warning to those who have no interest in Vogue or fashion marketing or Anna Wintour) This is one of those articles that I write and submit to Bazaar, knowing that the chances are I will be rejected. But who knows, one day I may actually end up in there, and if not, I can always publish the "best of" my rejections...

It was another semi-smooth morning in our household. The new "breakfast together" rule was enforced, and The Boy and Little One grunted and nodded their way through pancakes. The second new rule is...everybody eats the same thing. When I was growing up, mom put something on the table and we ate. I have no idea how I have morphed into this short-order cook, taking requests and driving myself crazy trying to fix custom meals. But this year, I have decided to go with the old-fashioned approach...I decide what to cook....and everyone eats it. The Boy looked at his pancakes and said "What happened to my bacon and eggs?" Well, I replied, I decided on pancakes today. Maybe tomorrow. And to my surprise, he sat down and ate every bite. Gee, I should have done this along time ago.

The new uniform dress-code has worked out well thus far...I actually think they both look terrific, and I have to say that I can already see this saving me lots of time, especially where the Little One is concerned. We no longer have to spend an hour staring at her closet each night and rating outfits...and it is interesting to see how she puts her spin on the uniform...today, she tied her sash backwards around her shorts and it looked totally different than yesterday. The Boy now has so few options that he can lay out his own clothes. I think I like this. I take back every bad thing I said about polyester this and boring that....live and learn.

And so with all of the time saved from meals and uniforms, I have decided to take my paint brushes out of storage and begin painting again. A few people have requested paintings in the last few years, but since moving here, I just hadn't had the desire or heart to paint. In fact, I think the last painting I did was for my mother-in-law before she died. I saw it hanging in her beach condo this past summer and it brought tears to my eyes. But good tears. So I have a few ideas of my own, and I think I'll surprise a few people that have asked...

So until tomorrow, when the school year continues to have a nice feel to it, and I have decided that the key to success is my own attitude...

Monday, August 17, 2009

On The First Day of School

It wasn't as bad as I thought. In fact, to be perfectly honest, it was a great morning. The first day of school has been depressing to me for...gosh, I don't even know how many years at this point. All the way back to the Big Sister starting kindergarten...I distinctly remember dropping her off (she never looked back) and I walked out and cried in my car. Fast forward to this morning...I woke The Boy up early and we discussed how neither of us had gotten much sleep. We decided we were nervous and anxious and excited ("Mom, what are you nervous about? You're just dropping us off). We had a lovely breakfast together...a new rule I have implemented. Breakfast must be eaten at the table without ESPN or cartoons. Shockingly, he never complained, but chatted about the upcoming day. Little One was still sleeping because she only had Open House today at a later time. Now I am well aware that today's adrenaline probably played a part in the smoothness of the morning, but I am saying a little prayer that this is a routine that we can all adjust to. Is it too much to hope that all mornings can be this happy and upbeat? Probably...but one can always be hopeful on the first day of school.

Little One had the choice of being dropped off, or having me walk her in. I told her that if I walked her in, she wasn't allowed to abandon me and order me to leave when she spotted her friends. "I Won't!" she promised. The minute she hit the steps and saw all of her mother-less friends, she gave me the look and whispered "You can go now....". Big surprise. So I waited back...but still got my peak of her in the room. And then, as I was leaving, I spied The Boy outside on his break...and he waved to me with his big goofy grin...and I was proud of myself for not bursting out in tears.

And so this morning, as we start a new year, I am hopeful that it will good one for all of us. The Rebel , who I am re-naming The Senior, is also preparing to start school. She called discussing schedules and classes and professors...and then said "I feel like I've been going to school my whole life." I had to laugh to myself...because in fact, she has been going her whole life. And I wish her good luck this year, because being a senior in college is exciting, yet daunting. For next year, there will be jobs to pursue and life becomes a bit more challenging in some ways.

So until tomorrow, with the hope that every morning can go as well as this one did...

Friday, August 14, 2009

On Being Thankful

School starts back on Monday, which would usually put me in a state of depression. I have always found this time of year so sad. Even though the kids can absolutely drive me crazy, I like having them around, and I definitely like the slower ebb and flow of the summer days. But this year, I am determined to look at things differently. I have been ferverently reading the Alana Stewart book about Farrah Fawcett that I referred to yesterday. It is so heart-wrenching that I literally have to read a chapter and then put it down and go do something else. The description of what this poor woman went through for several years prior to her death is just beyond description. Having been through the horrible process of losing my dad, my mother-in-law and my mom to cancer in the last 3 years, I thought I had experienced the worst of it. Especially with my mother-in-law, who waged a fearsome battle against ovarian cancer. But without being indelicate here, after reading the description of what Farrah went through during her fight against anal cancer, I cannot even descibe how courageous and strong she was.

You know the feeling you get sometimes when you are in the midst of a terrible stomach virus or flu? You promise yourself that if you can just get through it, you will appreciate every healthy moment you have...and then of course 2 days later you are well and complaining about some minor issue once again. Well today, I am filled with that feeling even though I have only read about it. I am reminded that while I am stressed out over not finding the right school supplies or cleaning up after the dog...there are people who are truly suffering and fighting for their life. And I am reminded to open my eyes and take life moment -by-moment and be thankful...

And so today, I will try to be in a state of gratitude that:

1) I had a wonderful dinner with all my girls last night...and my Tike. The Tike belongs to the Rebel...and yes, for those who follow the blog, The Rebel is a senior in college and not married...which means exactly what is sounds like. So The Little One is an aunt (a very adored aunt) and I am a....Nonni...which is the Italian word for grandmother (a name that was lovingly recommended by my mother-in-law, who intuitively knew at the time that because of ages and situations, Nonni was the perfect title)...And as Tom Hanks said in You've Got Mail..."We...are....an American family", with all of our ups and down. And I always hesitate to talk about this to people I do not know, because the lovely Rebel is a dean's list college senior and a very good mommy...not at all what one might stereotype when hearing about her...and so unless I know you well, I am probably not going to give you the chance to make that unfair stereotype....and so today, I am thankful for time spent with all of them, because we all have busy lives and we are separated by many miles...so dinners together are rare and treasured...

2) Thankful for the many days spent at Grandma's house this summer...with all of it's memories...I was blessed hands-down with the best mother-in-law in the world, and this house keeps her alive in my heart.

3) Thankful for the Husband, who rules the world, but makes me laugh on a daily basis..

4) Thankful for my friend Kelly, who e-mailed me after yesterday's blog and said that she would of course be the "Alana to my Farrah" if the need ever arose...

5) And thankful for The BiG Sister who is patiently waiting for me to finish my blog so she can fill me in on her evening...and thankful for Beloved Niece whose e-mails cause me to literally belly-laugh during the day...

So until Monday, with pencils sharpened and bookbags packed, when I will swallow the tears and welcome in a new school year...

Thursday, August 13, 2009

This and That

So I am headed back to Grandma's today for two last days of vacation. I decided why not?? Why not take advantage of it while I can? So in the morning, I will be writing to the familiar sights and sounds of the golf course...

Big Sister got into a facebook fight with a co-blogger. They both have shops on line, and they have shared information and ideas. The girl posted a note that basically decried all those who do not support the President's health-care plan as bad people. Big Sister replied that she was not only a good person, but a well-thought our person who just did not happen to support socialized medicine....and on it went...the interesting thing about this debate in our country is how it becomes such a "them vs us". In France, you can sit down over a cup of espresso and talk about the pros and cons without malice. One is able to appreciate the wonderful and efficient daycare available, the extended maternity care, the pediatricians who still make house calls....and on the other hand, you can also discuss how you may be turned down by 4 hospitals before you find one that is available to deliver your baby...how if you need certain procedure done, you probably want to look elsewhere...and on and on. But it is all discussed in a civil manner, with no inference that anybody is less than caring. Regardless of what happens in this debate, there will always be those who take advantage...and there will always be those who genuinely need the help. The answer to the issue lies somewhere in the gray-area of life. Let's take care of those who truly cannot take care of themselves...but let's not create a welfare nation...end of lecture.

Great trip to Target yesterday. I was there to pick up the wonderful 4 in 1 wipes from the Boots line...while I was picking them up, I spied a new moisturizer in the line that looked interesting. A lady standing near me asked if I had tried it. I told her I had tried much of the line, but not that particular lotion. She told me she had seen a special on CNN where they touted this line (Boots) as scientifically-proven to help reverse aging. How good did I feel??? We both grabbed a jar (there were only two left) and she also grabbed a couple of the pieces I suggested. It was such a nice exchange...Little one was standing there listening in confusion...she later asked if I "knew that lady cause i just started talking"....I explained that we were just exchanging info...but I headed to the cashier feeling bouyed by my new information and product. I also picked up a book by Alana Stewart called "My Journey with Farrah". It detailed the friendship between Farrah Fawcett and Alana Stewart (Rod's ex) during Farrah's cancer diagnosis and treatment. I had read an exerpt in a magazine and cried my eyes out. I knew I wanted to read the rest. (By the way, 3 chapters into the book, and it is lovely, touching and inspiring...but keep some tissues near). The sweet cashier picked it up and said she would also like to read it. She was probably barely 20, but she said that she thought Farrah was just so beautiful...(This book made me think of my friend Kelly, who I feel like would be my "Alana" if this ever happened to me...)

Other purchases included the school supplies for Little One...she has graduated from little girl to...well, I don't know. She adores Selena Gomez (and if you don't know who she is, you don't have a little girl...she is a star of the Disney Channel) and every purchase has to in some way make her "be like Selena". I actually love this part of her life...for me, it was Farrah and Susan Dey from the Partridge family...for the Big Sister it was Punky Brewster (although she now has an "unhealthy obsession" with Miley Cyrus)...for the soon-to-be renamed Rebel, it was anyone with an attitude...just kidding, it was Britney...and so it goes. We all have our girl heroes.

So until tomorrow, when school looms ever nearer...but I'm hanging on to my final days of summer...

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

On Health-Care and such

I haven't discussed politics for weeks. I've been trying to find a way to discuss health -care reform in a studied, yet candid manor, but it has alluded me. This has been a debate that I have carried on for years with some friends, especially some from France, where I too have witnessed the good side of socialized medicine...but the truth of the matter is...even the most liberal of the French will tell you that the system is far from perfect...and that despite the fact that maternity leave, daycare, etc. are top-notch, they come at a price.



Our President has been on a rampage lately, espousing his views at town hall meetings, and calling anyone who disagrees a cynic. All of a sudden, this has become a "do or die' issue. All or none. Either you agree with him...or you are participating in a "decline of civil debate". In response to this, Dorothy Rabinowitz crafted a beautiful response in yesterday's Wall Street Journal. So instead of trying to write about it myself, today I choose to quote Dorothy:



"That treatment, or rather it's memory-__like the adulation of his great mass of voters__has had its effect on our President, and not all to good. The election over, the warming glow of those armies of supporters gone, his capacity to tolerate criticism and dissent from his policies grows thinner apace. His lectures, explaining his health-care proposals, and why they'll be good for everybody, are clearly not going down well with his national audience.



This would have to do with the fact that the real Barack Obama-product of the academic left, social reformer with a program, is now before that audience, and what they hear in this lecture about one of the central concerns in their lives__his message freighted with generalities__they are not prepared to believe that our first most important concern is now health-care reform or all will go under.



The president has a problem. For, despite a great election victory, Mr. Obama, it becomes ever clearer, knows little about Americans. He knows the crowds__he is at home withe those. He is a stranger to the country's heart and character.



He seems unable to grasp what runs counter to its nature. That Americans don't take well, for instance, to bullying, especially of the moralizing kind, implicit in those speeches on health-care for everybody. Neither do they wish to be taken where they don't know if they want to go and being told it's good for them.



Who would have believed that this politician celebrated, above all, for his eloquence and capacity to connect with voters would end up as president proving so profoundly tone deaf? A great many people is the answer__the same who listened to those speeches of his during his campaign, searching for their meaning.



I took this battle over health-care to reveal the bloom coming off this rose, but that was coming. It began with the spectacle of the president, impelled to go abroad to apologize for his nation-repeatedly. It is not, in the end, the demonstrators in those town-hall meetings or the agitations of his political enemies that Mr. Obama should fear. It is the judgement of those Americans who have been sitting quietly in their homes, listening to him."



Amen.

What Worked and What Didn't

Chick blog today. We are nearing the end of summer, so it is worth taking a look at the beauty products that we spoke about a few months ago...always good to see what worked and what did not.

1) The hands-down winner was Flirty Mango. As I said last week, I've found nothing better...and I made the mistake of trying. I received so many positive comments on this one that I briefly thought about becoming a company spokesperson...

2) Tracie Martyn Shakti Resculpting body Cream....This was the one I mortgaged my house to buy...the one that smelled so bad....the one that was suppose to make everything look firm and tight. Now look...the reason I splurged on this one is because I read an article on Kate Winslet where she raved about it. The accompanying picture was just gorgeous...but silly me....the picture was of her face, not her body! Anyway, she seems like a trustworthy person...so I tried it. Does it work? Maybe. I mean, yes, if you slather yourself in it before you go to the pool, you probably look a little firmer and tighter....but good grief....I'd rather walk an extra mile on the treadmill and throw on some self-tanner and accomplish the same thing for a fraction of the price...

3) On the same note, you know what does work? Laura Mercier Body Mousse. This lotion has a slight color to it, and if you put it on your legs, they look great. For those of you who like me, gave up panty hose years ago...this is for you. No chance of lines because it washes off...but it does not rub off once you put it on.

4) New product Alert...I forgot my blush at the beach, so I picked up Maybelline Dream Mousse Blush. I love this stuff! The colors are soft and pretty...and you just have to use a little bit to get a nice glow. It was the perfect summer product.

5) Everything I tried from the Body Shop. Honestly. if you remember, I bought several lotions and body butters...basically anything that had a coconut fragrance. Their products are SO reasonably priced, and good quality. I also tried the eye-makeup remover, and it is terrific.

6)Speaking of Eye makeup remover, the 4-in-one wipes from the Boots line at Target is still my favorite. For $6, these little wipes take off every little bit of mascara, eye liner...not to mention any other make up. I keep these stashed everywhere. This Boots line is terrific. There is also a Lemon Body wash that I really like. If I need a "filler" item...in other words, I don't want to spend a lot of money on something...this is the line I go to...

7) Ok, I loved the Maybelline Fat Lash mascara in the orange tube. I will definitely buy it again...but I have to admit that my next mascara purchase is going to be the Chanel mascara. At twenty-something...it's no steal....but it is the best I've tried...and I just LOVE having something with that lovely C on my counter.

8) Armani Glow Lotion. Listen, anything from Armani is just wonderful. I am using this so spraringly so it will last. A little bit gives you this nice glow..and I cannot rave enough about their base make up. it goes on light, yet gives great coverage. It's pricey, but again...I don't use it everyday.

9) Calvin Klein Cream Eye shadow. The jury is still out on this one...I love the texture and coverage...but I think I picked the wrong color. I can't say that I will try it again...

10) Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer....This remains the best in this category as far as I am concerned. I buy this year-round and use it most days when I don't have anything to do, but just want some sunblock and light coverage. I have not used a Laura Mercier product that wasn't terrific. Her scented lotions like creme brulee and lemon are just wonderful. I stare at them every time I am at the mall counter...but I only break down occaisonally because they are not cheap.

Ok, that's it for the day. The Brother-in-Law is now in hysterics...he finds these "beauty days' to be so funny...but he clearly doesn't understand that we women need this information....I just try to save my reader the money of buying Allure magazine or In Style...I mean, that is $10, and you don't even know who tried the products, right??? and I'm not advertising...so you know, I have no hidden agenda....just sayin'

So until tomorrow, when we will discuss the fact that I have a new follower from the Phillipines...

Monday, August 10, 2009

"As Long As Habit and Routine Dictate the Pattern of Living, New Dimensions of the Soul Will Not Emerge"

Isn't it interesting how we are all products of our routines and environments? Our daily rituals and schedules tend to define us as people. It's not until we take a step back and open our eyes to how "others do it" that we actually learn about ourselves.

After a week at the beach with the addition of The Boy's friend, I am reminded of what a gift it is to see things through the eyes of others. The friend, a terrific boy...well-mannered and behaved...has his own rhythm. He wakes at the crack of dawn, he goes to bed early, he never eats fast-food, and he will not watch the Braves games. As opposed to The Boy who cannot go to sleep before 11:30, hates to wake up before 9 (and lately, 10), has never met a cheeseburger he doesn't like...and LIVES for the Braves game. It was interesting to see the melding of lives this past week, and I have to say, to both of their credit, they negotiated and compromised, which is always a good thing in life. I suppose when you are 12 and there is a beach, a pool, a workout room, a computer...not to mention the friend's phone...there should not be too much credit given to getting along. I mean, if you can't do it under those circumstances...

When I was in middle school, my best friend's family used to invite me to their lake house for the weekend. I used to love the dynamic in their house...although it took some getting used to. There were always lots of people in and out, lots of food being constantly prepared, lots of noise...and everyone was expected to pitch in and help. It was a pleasure to be there...to spend time with her sweet mom...and forceful dad...who EXPECTED me to get up on those skis on my first try...I looked forward to those weekends, and looking back, I realize that they were a gift...

In high school, I headed to my boyfriend's lake house for the weekend. This was another lesson for me, unaccustomed as I was to the different social rituals of some. His family enjoyed hunting and drinking. It was quite a combination, and a bit intimidating for someone who had never eaten quail, or never witnessed her parents having a drink. But again, what a gift it was, for they were wonderful people, and I learned so much from them. My world was expanded just by being with them. He was a pilot and a hang-glider, and though I never learned to fly a plane, I did learn to hang-glide, which looking back, was such a fun addition to my life. Having three brothers and a father who was president of a pro-basketball team, I was only accustomed to "norm sports". To get some exposure to a different view of life changed me as a person.

As I have written before, I started college when I was 16. As much of an eye-opener as this was, I am sure it was made a little easier by the fact that I had already been exposed to many life-styles. My parents led a very small, sheltered life, dictated by their beliefs, up-bringings and interests. But it was my time spent with others that expanded my life, and helped me to see that there is no right way...but only a different way....

When Big Sister was in college, she was sent to Washington DC to meet with others in her major (political science). I don't remember the purpose of the meeting, but I do remember the phone calls from her discussing how different everyone was and how her southern gentil-ness was being tested. It was once again a great lesson in life. She learned about holding your own and expressing opinions...and then putting it aside and socializing...To say she came home a different person would be an overstatement, but she definitely came home a wiser person.

And so this morning, I am reminding myself that life is so much more than my routine and ritual, and I will do my kids a favor if I encourage this. It is so tempting to protect and shelter, but in the end, it is the ability to go away and come back a little wiser that adds to our life. After all, how do you learn what you really like if you don't try new things?...(Of course, it also reminds me that another trip to France would be in order...I can almost hear the collective sighs of The Boy and The Husband...who spend most of their time searching out The Quick...the equivalent of Burger King)..

So until tomorrow, when I will consciously choose to "mix it up " a bit....make a few changes...change things around...and hopefully encourage my kids to do the same...

Friday, August 7, 2009

Ten Lessons to be Learned at the Beach

1) If you are forced to take your injured cat with you, do not let her loose in the car no matter how good she is, because she will inevitably relieve herself on the seat, making for a nauseating rest of the trip...

2) If you bring along a friend, no matter how wonderful he is, you are not allowed to yell or scream at your kids, which makes for a lot of built up frustration. It is hard to be June Cleaver or Clare Huxtable for a whole week.

3) Workout goals are tough to achieve at the beach. Day one, I swam laps and went to the workout room. Day two, I worked out, but did not swim laps. Day 3, I went for a long walk. Day 4, I sat on the couch and ate half a bag of kettle chips while watching a movie...

4) If you search for crabs at night with the Little One, wear ear plugs...

5) If you tell The Boy and his friend to be sure and hang up their suits and towels everyday, don't expect it to happen. You will find this out when the overwhelming smell of mildew wafts from their room on Day 3.

6) Don't try to play whiffle ball on the beach 4 days in a row if you expect to be able to walk on Day 5...

7) If you make pancakes for breakfast on the first day...they will be expected every day...you won't be able to get by with toast and cereal...

8) Don't even think about going home with all clean clothes...remember, you have two 12 year old boys along...

9) Any hygiene issues that arise with a 12 year old boys are doubled with a friend along....along with the various sounds and smells that also accompany them...

10) Collecting sea shells with Little One never gets old...

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Ten Things I Was Happy to Find At the Beach

I love this place at the beach. It is calm, serene,peaceful...and decorated in a sort of Tuscan, eclectic, beachy way...I know, hard to picture...but I love it. Here are the top 10 reasons...


1) Imagine how happy I was to see my Flirty Mango shaving cream here! During my sojourn at Grandma's house, I ran out. I ran to the store to pick some up, when a tube of Alba organics Mango Vanilla shaving cream caught my eyes...I don't know what came over me...I mean, the blog that I wrote about Flirty Mango received more comments than any I have written (let's don't examine that too closely)...but I caved and bought it. So let me save you the heartache...it isn't any good. Too much like lotion and not a great smell either. I should have known better. Afterall, I had already tried their pineapple enzyme cleanser...and though I forced myself to finish the whole bottle, I hated it. But anyway, I had forgotten that I had left a can of Flirty here at the beach...I jumped in the tub and shaved immediately!





2) My 5 year old cut-off Gap jean shorts. Oh how I love these shorts. These are my "weight-watcher" shorts. If they fit...all is right with the world. Unfortunately, 90%of pictures of me at the beach are in these. They work for swimsuit cover-ups, ball games, walks...you name it. And you know, I can change the shirts up...





3) My good friend Kelly gave me a book a few years back entitled "Entrez-Nous...Discovering Your Inner French Girl"....If you read this blog, you know I am a francophile. This book never gets old to me. I read and re-read it hoping it will rub off on me.





4) Pomegranate soap....I bought this lovely over-priced soap and the accompanying wooden holder a few years ago when the Big Sister and the SIL were coming for a visit. After they left, I put it in my room and each trip I put it out for the smell and looks alone...





5) White Boston Proper Bathing suit....I wrote about this suit last trip. It is the exact rip-off of the one that Charlotte wore in the Sex and the City movie, but it was about a third of the cost. It is well-made and useful...meaning I can lay out or swim laps in it...





6) 3 Signs in this condo that sum up my life...The first says "My husband says I don't listen to him, at least I think that's what he said."


The second says "If it weren't for coffee, I'd have no personality at all." And the last one says "Always kiss me goodnight". Those pretty well sum it up...





7) The coffee maker. I mean, it is so good, you'd think I was in a cafe in France....





8) Dining room table...it seats 10 easily....and it is so pretty I could stare at it all day.





9) My 2 year old Vogue magazine with Kate Moss on the cover. I'm sure everyone that stays here wonders why I keep this. But this is the best issue in years. Inside it are pages and pages of the most beautiful clothes you've ever seen. I just love to flip through it. Warning to anyone who stays here: Never Get Rid of the Vogue!!





10) My Family...Come on...you knew I had to say that, right? The only thing better would be if the Big Sis, the SIL, and the Rebel and Tike were here....well, and maybe the dog...



So with lots of gratefulness for everything and everyone here...and until Day After Tomorrow...because I am off tomorrow....

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

The Beach Gourmet

Did anybody watch the finale of The Food Network Star? Little One and I are addicted to this show. Every week, we vote for who needs to be eliminated. We were disheartened when Jamiica was booted a couple of weeks ago...but in the end. it came down to stay-at-home mom Melissa and man-of -the-world, Jeffrey. I was rooting for Melissa, and Little One was rooting for Jeffrey. Now I liked Jeffrey...especially his lavender shirts and his laissez-faire way of dressing...but I just felt Melissa was the underdog...and I always love the underdog...



On the finale, Jeffrey did a demo show called "Ingredient Smuggler".He used an ingredient from North Africa..I forget the name...but look...it came in a tube. I cannot eat anything from a tube...I only squirt medication out of a tube..you know, neosporin...aloe vera....but not food. It's a shame, because his sandwich looked delicious...but i could not get the tube out of my mind...



Melissa, on the other hand, whipped up her 4 step chicken over spinach and au gratin potatoes. My mouth was watering...she made it look so easy that after they announced her the winner, I ran to the grocery store to buy the ingredients. And last night, I whipped up the first prize meal. I added corn-on-the-cob and biscuits...because my kids can like anything with those 2 additions. The Husband ate every bite and went back for more, which was a good sign....The Boy picked and whined because there were no cheeseburgers involved...but he ate. Little One devoured the chicken...and Friend declared the potatoes "delicious". (Ok, he is very polite.) But honestly...go to the food Network Site and look up this meal. It is delicious and easy.....I'm definitely adding it to my recipe book...



So until later on, when the beach gourmet will be whipping up all kinds of delicious meals...

Later in the Day...

I'm taking this opportunity while I have it. For some unknown reason, my computer is staying on more than 42 seconds at a time this afternoon, so I will take advantage, especially since I am beached out and worked out for the day...

Just a quick word about last night's whiffle ball game which I referred to this morning. The Husband bowed out due to a bum knee (which he received when playing in a pick-up game of basketball last week. I would be remiss in saying that this was not just any pick-up game...but a game which included some of the Atlanta Falcon football players...and never one to name-drop, he totally held his own with Roddy White and DeAngelo Hall...and OK OK, the SIL(son-in-law)is now hoping I will say he played too, and very well...and The Boy held his own, not throwing up his requisite 3-point misses, but instead, passing the ball and playing defense...enough so that Mr. White complimented him on his game..) BUT enough of that, and back to the whiffle ball game. It was Little One and Myself against The Boy and Friend. As previously stated, we were up by 3 in the 5th inning...The Boy is at bat...Little One looks out at me in the outfield and yells "You Pitch...You are too slow!" .....Excuse me??? I'm too slow?? I am being thrown to the pitcher's mound due to lack of speed??? The Boy and the Friend are snickering...because they were thinking the same thing. But Little One, in all of her competitive glory, tells it like it is.

Well...I go launch into how many hits I have and how many runs I have scored.....she listens with a glazed look on her face...and then says..."Sorry mom...they are jacking them over your head and you are TOO SLoW. You pitch...." Well, I never. But I did. I limped to the pitchers mound and struck out The Boy. (Ok, he hit a fly ball which Little One caught) And the game is over.

And so this is how it is when you get a little older...you get relegated to the mound by your 10 year old daughter. Nobody even appreciates the fact that you hung in there for 6 innings...or that you got up at the crack of dawn to fix breakfast...or that you fixed a 5 course meal for dinner....NO...nobody cares about this.....

So this morning, I bowed out of the kickball game, claiming I had a bum ego. I read my magazine and laid in the sun, while The Husband limped around the bases.....An by the way, I noticed he was pitching...

So until tomorrow, when we will discuss meals at the beach...

Day 2 and the Coast is Still Clear...

I'll keep it short, because i may get kicked off at any minute. Any internet access is only available in a small corner of The Boy's room that he is sharing with a friend. Therefore, I am forced to write while dodging balls and smelling an overload of Axe deoderant spray...

The beach is beautiful. Little One and I are having a ball finding shells and dodging crabs. The Boy and his friend are alternating shooting water guns and texting girls...The Husband is working a bit, but enjoying the beach too.

If you kept up with the last trip, you'll remember that I was met a few mornings by a Mexican worker coming out of a guest bedroom. I would sip my coffee and nod as he murmured "Buenos Dias". So far, so good on that score....but it is only day 2...and The Husband does not usually throw these "surprises" at me for a few days...I continue to wear sweatpants in any common areas of the condo.

The Boy and friend challenged Little One and me to a whiffle ball game last night...Happy to say the girls won out...11-9....but 6 innings of whiffle ball on the beach have worn me out...so the workout room is out today...

I'll close for the morning and hope that i can get on later. The Boy and friend have eaten a total of 22 pancakes and are now ready for the beach.

So until this afternoon...

Monday, August 3, 2009

Kicked Off and Deleted

I've tried posting the blog several times today...but the internet access here at the beach is so limited that I have been kicked off and deleted repeatedly. I am beyond frustrated...because I had a lot to say....so i am giving up for today, but check back tomorrow. Hopefully I will find a spot where I can write and post....

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Be It Ever So Humble...There's No Place Like Home

We were back home last night for one quick stay before the beach. Yesterday was too busy to leave anytime for sadness and sentiment at leaving Grandma's house. As I look out this morning, I do miss the view...there is no beautiful course or cursing golfer in my sight...but there are things to appreciate about being here too...

1) I was incapable of making a decent cup of coffee at Grandma's House. Now I am generally known (and I say this with complete humility) for my good coffee...but either the coffee maker was off...or I was....because this morning, I am enjoying the best cup I've had all summer.

2) I'm glad to see my paintings. Between my own, and the ones The Husband and I have collected on our travels, we have a house filled with paintings...not many bare spaces. This makes me happy..and I had forgotten how much I missed them. I did tote a few to Grandma's, and they helped...but it's good to see my old favorites.

3)Little One's BFF. Life is just not the same for the Little One when BFF is not next door. We have had her with us for many nights at grandma's ...but really...we need her in close proximity.

4) My books. Like my paintings...I have a need to be surrounded by an inordinate amount of books. Again, I brought many to Grandma's, but here, I have anything I want at hand, in French or English.

5) My closet. Now as previously stated, I do not have a large or grand closet. But it is a well-organized and pretty closet. All shoes are boxed and labeled...all purses are lined up according to season and color....it is like a work of art. I was pleased with my little wardrobe that I kept at Grandma's...but it was good to walk in and remember that I had more to choose from.

I could go on, but The Husband has announced that departure time is near, and I am not ready...so until tomorrow, when we will be one day closer to the beach...but not nearly as sad as I thought to be back home...