The Big Zoo Trip

22 hours after I boarded the little bus with 9 other parents, to follow the big bus of 50 kids, 2 teachers and 1 principal, I stepped off and back into the real world. It almost felt like it had been a dream...and some parts had been very, very scary....

The ride down was like the high school bus. Guys in the back and girls in the front...except for a few brave women who were willing to listen to the men discuss a magazine cover of Shakira in graphic terms. I felt fortunate to be sitting with the mother of Little One's BFF...she dove into the seat next to me and begged me to stay with her the entire time...ok, maybe it was the other way around. Either way, we chatted and ate our sack dinners and tried to ignore the loud conversation in back...At one point, my friend whispered, "I could have gone my whole life without hearing that."

Earlier in the day, a friend had suggested that I could find airplane bottles of vodka at the package store to add to my sack dinner....However, it was imperative that I be at my best since I was chaperoning, so I stuck to diet coke...

It was dark when we finally reached the zoo, so we dove right into the 'night crawler' activities. We examined swamp water, used night vision glasses to watch kangaroos, and petted chinchillas. The kids had a blast. At the mid-point, we were suppose to have a "snack". I was absolutely starving, having skimped on my sack lunch dinner. Unfortunately, I forgot it wasn't snack time at the Ritz...there were no homemade cookies and tea...but rather watered down lemonade out of an old cooler and a pack of stale animal crackers (get it? animal crackers at the zoo). I tried to get a second pack of crackers, but they removed the box before I could casually sneak over.

Around 10:30, we returned to the big building where we were to sleep. I was a bit discouraged to see that most of us, men, women and kids...would be sleeping together in one room together. Little One and BFF scouted out an excellent spot in the back corner for our sleeping bags. Principal had kindly brought air mattresses for the chaperones, so we set up our area like good little campers, and then went to the communal bathroom to get ready for bed. I was shocked at the sight of several 4th grade girls primping for bed like they were dressing for a party. Of course, they were sleeping in the same room as the boys...but still......I was relieved that Little one refused to brush her teeth and her hair.

After everyone had climbed in their sleeping bags and the teacher had told her amusing bedtime story, light were out. I was so tired. Little One and BFF were already breathing heavy...And then it started. One of the dads began snoring...and not just your normal snoring, but your 'rock the rafters' snoring. Then one of the little girls began coughing...and not soft coughing, but the kind of coughing that sounds like you are losing a lung. And listen, before you think "gee, she should be more compassionate...it's a little girl"....just stop. At 3:00 in the morning, when you are listening to snoring and coughing in tandem...you are allowed to lose a bit of compassion. At 4:00, I cried. Really. I have never wanted to be home so badly in my whole life. Then I reminded myself that there were soldiers fighting wars and homeless people freezing in the streets...and I dried my sissy-girl tears and dozed off for about 30 minutes...

The teacher came in singing at 7:00. I felt delirious..but I knew if I could just hang on, there would be coffee shortly. We dressed quickly...packed our bags and loaded the bus. Then we headed to breakfast. The zoo staff reviewed the eating rules...including how we should not waste food and recycle everything. When they finished their talk, the adults raced to the coffee pot. Then I went to check on Little One. Now usually, she eats 3 bites of a pancake for breakfast. So what had she chosen?? 2 muffins, cereal and juice. I cringed, knowing that she would take 3 bites and leave the rest...and the staff would be glaring....So I did what any self-respecting mother would do...I finished every bit of her left overs.

Stuffed and exhausted, we headed out for our morning tour. We had a terrific guide. Justin was about 25, very knowledgeable, but even more important...funny. The tour was like a good Disney movie...80% for the kids..20% for the adults. From time to time, he would walk back to the adults and tell us something so funny that I would literally belly-laugh. After the tour, we broke onto our groups for an hour of free time. My group wanted to hit the gift shop. This was fine, except for the one girl who had about $50, but thought she had $300. She would bring various combinations of "stuff" to me and ask me if she 'had enough". After much editing, she finally settled on her "stuff". We headed to the meeting area, ate our sack lunches...and boarded the bus....

On the way home, the dads gave a play-by-play of their day...Does anyone ever notice how men can exaggerate their importance in any situation?? ..

Upon returning to the school, I literally said a prayer of thanks. It had been a fun trip for the kids...and I was truly glad to have been part of it...and truly glad to be home....

I didn't get to write about it that night because my computer is on the blink. The Husband offered me his computer to write...as long as I would let him edit......uh, NO. So a day later, I snuck in and "borrowed" it to get this written...

So until Monday, when hopefully my computer will be 'healthy" again...and I will have recovered from the big Zoo trip....